Last updated was beginning of 2010...
Newly set for another round start will be today..
Made myself a promised before my 27 big day arrival.. To get drunk and to enjoy to the fullest during the night party as im going to cut down the frequent of drinking as well as smoking...
Dunno why suddenly had that kind of feeling that alcoholic just cant go smooth into my body and the taste suddenly changed..
hmm.. hard to explain why but maybe as i said before many post ago, environment changes personalities... In life we do will meet many cross junction that we need to choose. Standing right in the middle of front and back, left or right. how would you choose?
Front= new perspective of life that leads you to another level of your life?
Left= a brand new beginning of life that you are unsure of but adventurous?
right= daily rountine life with not much adventurous?
back= very enjoyable life with less work and no achievement?
For now and finally i would choose front.
i had chosen the last three choices before and i think its enough..
The very 1st choice i chosen was during my interior life and i chose right...
i'm stuck in a small interior design firm, i worked from morning till midnigght, rushing all drawing and facing all sort of house owners. At first there were lots of achievement and happiness during the 4 year life but then slowly, i found out that i had a very unhealthy lifestyle as in working too long hours.
Thats where oppunitiy comes and i chose left. The second cross junction.
I started off doing business with my friend. a new life and business that was totally out of wat i had done previously. i took my risk and join the adventure.
Of cause everthing was going towards what we expected but things went off track abit and i chose to leave the company.
Here come the third cross junction of my life and i chose back.
i went back to interior again but this time round on my own and with one other friend. business wasnt that good but i still out there enjoying and partying.. never even tot of the daily expenses issues. but when comes to like expenses turning high,
i changed to start the cleaning business again. although this time round busiiness doing good, but still im not interested to strive for it. im still swimming in the pool of alcohol.. drink then drank then drunk... totally not in the mood of bringing the company up to another lvl.. whenever drinking session start, " oh today i closed news sale i have to celebrate" and these were the reason for me to covered up that im just cant stop partying life...
see during this choice i had made.. im just running round n round but gets to nowhere.
Finally this year 2010, during my days in my reservist. i went into deep tot.. of cause during my reservist time all of my job site when hiwire that why i went into deep tot.
is it time for me to really damn wake up my bloody idea as i know myself so well that even a slight temptation i can lost focus and goes off track..
Therefore i tried all those thing that i haven got the chance to try till my birthday that had just past.
during the days after my reservist till my birthday, dun really know it is mentality or what so ever, suddenly those alcohol taste so bitter and wasnt like it used to be.
Finally i came to a conclusion. its not the mentality or the taste of the alcohol. I realised i finally awaken...
That why i chosen front at this point of the cross junction. I know that i cannot resist the temptation then i need to cut down.
I came across this quote in fb “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” – Lao Tzu, posted from one of my friend. Wow.. really gives me an impact..
Just a short sentance yet so meaningful.
i gave myself a quote "if i cannot resist it, i had turn away. only that i can change.." LOL can make it right this sentence LOL...
I even tot to quit smoking hahha.. so far im doing well in controling lighting up a smoke.. Only when disaster call then i hide in that room and light one.. i guessed it's habits.. One step at a time... might be difficult but Out of difficulties there is miracle.. i learned it thru a hk drama series :P
Yes this time round my perspective point of view changed again. i had so many thing to fulfill. in a very short period of time i need to hit my expected income. time running out soon. Soon im going to carry up my dad burden. im taking over the responsibilities of the support pillar of the household from my dad. i got no time to fool around anymore.. one year time? or the lastest two years time...
i'm starting to understand some of my fren/buddies out there are the support pillar of the household. need to salute them..
haha of cos sometime i need to also destress ok.. ops! is it an excuse for me to swim in the pool of alcohol again? LOL of cause not.. few glasses that can reach the lvl of my throat that enough.
Oh ya also targeting to have a routine sport to keep myself fit and healthy.. so sad on my birthday, i met one of my secondery school fren during my dinner time, she commented on me " you becoming more n more thin" oh gosh... really hit me... somemore after my birthday i saw those topless photo of myself.. Haix....
NEED TO KEEP FIT N STRONG.. GAIN MEAT :P LOL
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