Enlightening..

Finally after sometime.. really overcome some fear just in one night..
for all this will having my hobbies job, lots of fear, doubt, being lay on proper path to follow or the teaching had made me tired of life.
Its true that once a great man told me " life is getting boring once u know more then u know, and you get tired of it if you understand more to it."
for all this while, i realise that i onli get boring of life because for some reason i know more that what i should know. After a great tok to the mighty one, its jus the beginning of life and road that i jus choosen.
Are my current learning a wrong move or right thing?? i dont really know.. what i know is i didnt done wrong and i still helping out with my pure heart to pple that needed.

Last night, a short 3 hour talk to the mighty one, i got enlightened... i felt release, relief and calm.. it is great wisdom really enlighten me or for all this while i didnt really enlighten myself but buried myself in fear and doubt? for wat i know my answer now..
Life.. it can be jus ended less then 5 min if you do have the courage to take 5 min to end, why you dont have the courage to use this 5 min to think how to live another 5 more min with joy?
to think easy to see open i guess easy to say hard to do.. onli when last night i got to know to take thing easy and to see more open is jus at the tip of finger.. maybe to me now not for the others..
each and every case and incident will happen, but wat is the causes of it? we angry we sad we frown we happy, what made us react to it??
last night i got the ans.. 'HEART' for all this while heart is always the one tat made us go havoc or peace..
example.. why do i like drinking so much in the 1st place? it spent money, made health bad, made u cant work next day, but why i still love it? cos i treat alcohol is my best fren.. why he is my best fren, because when i happy or sad i jus drink him and he wun scold mi and wun hit me.. he even bring joy to me and made mi slp so well.. in my heart beer already got a room for himself.. so no wonder jus a few call from my fren my heart started to itchy and follow to places that have beer...
and the cause of when i love drinkin if because.. i believe each and everyone has their own dead knot in heart that can open it.. and this is wat happen to me.. when i myself cant open it i choose to run away from it and follow my heart to beer..
now am i choosing the right way in life?? guess not.. so what happen now is that i got to change..
the great one.. pls wait for me.. i need to adjust myself to your expectation then i can ask you to show me the way of teaching.. as far as i know you are a pure great one that i cannot drop your water face.. and as well i know if to learn the way of your teaching i still got many bad point to rule out my life..
your words already printed in my mind deeply and strongly for me to follow the right way..
I MUST DO IT...


to believe it or not.. you seen it or not?? where is god in our life?? does they really help us?? most important is we have to help ourself before we can help pple... so i have to help myself 1st..
being along time work stressing me already.. and stress is the excuse for me to run away many thing.. till now i saw the great one.. other then to learn the hardship and dont give up life is still so beautiful.. to work to eat to slp.. balnce up you life in a gd way then you will find real path of road to success...
well i do tok alot today ya.. but haha today will be the last day of the old ah yuan michael or zhi yuan.. changes to the ultimate person is hard but is not impossible...

enough of me liao haha few days back is like a messed of many unwanted thing and happy things happen to many pple. 1stly the life of jazz pub, secondly sort of i dunno how to handle things well and got into small issues with 'TDB' and that incident also lead to 'EE' so fed up with it.. thirdly then think 'EE' got into some heart feeling matter which leads to a small fight with 'fan'..
ahh... so headache.. but all passed liao ah "rain over sky relationship" liao.. but the problem is next time got no more home 2 liao leh :P
hopefully monday we can have good news from vic loh...

On my way to stop drinking and maybe smoking and i think i can do it... yeah.. but 'TDB, EE' i still will rem wat i promised.. let you all chop one.. next time i use 'tea bring beer' :P

now getting worred about 'Fan' liao.. she too young and innocent to handle some relationship thing with a crappy disgusting guy.. hear my words 'Fan' if can get him out of ur life u better be if not u will get urself into trouble.. got it.. and 'EE' you better keep a look out ah.. keep me up date ah.. 'fan' correct me if im wrong ya.. no doubt u dun like that crappy disgusting guy, but u still enjoy the way he talk to u or maybe chat ah.. maybe u are young but i believe u can stay clear mind ah and dun ever get mesmerise by him ah...

'TDB and EE' if u understand wat i writen today pls remember and use it in life ah.. i might not have the right to teach pple but at least it is sensible to do it that way...

lastly i have to work hard liao!!!!!!